Friendships That Bridge Generations

Jody Spiegel has only one problem with her friend of the past 10 months.

“He roots for the wrong team,” said Spiegel, noting the New York Yankees cap that 68-year-old Irving Newman wears as the two sit across from each other at the Chandler Residential Care Facility in North Hollywood.

Maybe someday, Newman admits, he might wear a cap for the Cleveland Indians, the team Spiegel’s grandfather cheered for. But for now, it’s a point that the two enjoy teasing each other about.

Spiegel, a 36-year-old civil litigation lawyer for a downtown firm, and Newman, a native New Yorker who moved to California five years ago, wouldn’t have become friends without the Jewish Elder-Care Corps.

Not long after Spiegel’s grandfather died, she met Marilyn Gross, volunteer coordinator for Jewish Elder-Care Corps in the San Fernando Valley, in a local coffee shop, and chatted about her interests.

“I look for things that they have in common that could be the start of a friendship,” Gross said of the 75 pairs of senior citizens and younger volunteers she has arranged in recent years. Sports would be the common link for Spiegel and Newman, Gross decided.

At least once a week, on either a Friday or a Saturday, Spiegel visits Newman, watching as he calls a bingo game or listening to his stories of seeing Joe DiMaggio hit a grand slam home run in Yankee Stadium.

“Thank God I met her,” said Newman, who has no family. The death of his parents in New York had prompted him to move West. “She’s the thing that keeps me going.”

Spiegel brings Newman a lottery ticket each week. She’s bought him presents for Hanukkah, including a Yankees World Series video and coffee mug. Both are Jewish, but it is Newman that reminds Spiegel about how to observe the holidays.

Newman has lost 38 pounds since he first met Spiegel. She persuaded him to eat more nutritiously--Newman never ate broccoli before--and take better care of himself. But for Spiegel, visiting Newman has been a remedy for the stressful life of a lawyer.

“It makes all my troubles go away,” she said.

“You?” Newman said, pretending a shocked tone. “Have troubles?”

He gave a big smile.

“He’s always teasing me,” Spiegel said. “Both he and my grandfather always had a good sense of humor.”

But a month ago, Newman was gone when she showed up for her usual visit. He had been hospitalized.

“He didn’t want to be a bother,” she said. When she found him, she recalled for Newman, “I read you the riot act.”

To her, she told him, he is never a bother. And she has not let his shyness and worry about being a trouble get in the way. She insisted that Newman join her family for Thanksgiving.

“It wouldn’t have been a very good Thanksgiving without Irving,” said Spiegel’s husband, Dan Reddington. “I think he’s made a big difference in Jody’s life.”

Spiegel has learned from him, but Newman said he’s gotten more out of the arrangement. “I’ve learned how to live again,” Newman said.

Gross has a list of 100 senior citizens in the Valley who also need friends. Like Newman, many have no family.

“Just to go for a wheelchair walk is a very big deal for them,” said Kay Ginsberg, director of the Jewish Elder-Care Corps. Volunteers and clients can be of any faith, Ginsberg said.

To volunteer, call Gross at (818) 318-3996.

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