CHRIS DUFRESNE’S TOP 25
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1. Texas (0-0) Gore’s convention bounce not enough to knock Bush’s team from top spot.
2. Nebraska (0-0) Team practices “dominoes” drill for incoming San Jose State Spartans.
3. Florida State (1-0) Dillard’s blames 74% drop in quarterly earnings on Peter Warrick.
4. Alabama (0-0) Returning ’46 Rose Bowl members eager to ride Red Cars again.
5. Michigan (0-0) Doesn’t need Drew Henson to bowl over Bowling Green.
6. Wisconsin (0-0) Fans stocking up for Sept. 30 wagon train trip to Ann Arbor.
7. Georgia (0-0) Jim Donnan is 1-7 versus Florida and Tennessee, but who’s keeping track?
8. Florida (0-0) Spurrier cooking up a whole mess of ball plays for Ball State.
9. Miami (0-0) Three biggest obstacles to season are Huskies, Hokies and Weinkes.
10. USC (1-0) Your attention, please: Heritage Hall now open again to the public.
11. Virginia Tech (0-0) Georgia Tech balked when it heard makeup game was on San Andreas Fault.
12. Tennessee (0-0) USC revokes Anthony Munoz’s hall pass for letting son become a Volunteer.
13. Kansas State (1-0) First game turned out to be an Iowa opener for Bill Snyder.
14. Clemson (0-0) Bobby and Tommy open ACC’s exclusive “Bowdens only” club.
15. Ohio State (0-0) Another 6-6 season and Cooper may end up on Route 66.
16. Oklahoma (0-0) Josh Heupel-led offense should kick up a lot of dust.
17. Washington (0-0) Neuheisel puts team through potato-masher drills in preparation for Idaho opener.
18. Purdue (0-0) Ten more lightning strikes and Brees beats out Vick for Heisman.
19. Mississippi (0-0) Why Deuce? McAllister’s real name is Dulymus Jenod.
20. Texas Christian (0-0) This is a good team, for what it’s (Fort) Worth.
21. Illinois (0-0) We hear quarterback Kurk Kittner is one special K.
22. Oregon (0-0) If Ducks win Pac-10, Rankman vows to change name to “Eugene.”
23. UCLA (0-0) ‘Bama scout team QB makes defense jump with stagger count, “Hut-Hut, Y’all.”
24. Notre Dame (0-0) Saturday, it’s Texas A&M; versus Notre Dame 5&7.
25. Colorado (0-0) Buffs’ schedule maker ordered to run backward up Pike’s Peak.
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